All day, every day, they're buzzing in my head; rather, Soren is since Rollin specializes in dreams and big-picture plots while Soren is dominant in spur-of-the-moment and story details. Anyway, they're always nagging me with ideas. Write this or this, they say. But, when I actually sit down with my fingers to the keys, they totally shut up. Or go into insane hangover mode and talk rubbish.
This has led me to, not just writers' block, but full-out writers' drought. I got nothin' goin' on up there when it counts. I want desperately to pen or type, as it were my characters' lives. It was just the other day that Soren helped me create a few finer details to add to Leiliya, one of my main characters and my favorite. The problem is, I haven't even reached the point in the book where Leiliya even exists. After 11 years, I'm only a few pages into chapter three on my 822nd re-write. I'm at a total impasse with myself. I just don't know what to do anymore. Drawing keeps me from suffering stifled-creativity disease (SCD) which would eventually kill me, but I've had to stop drawing now in order to catch up on some of my digital coloring. I really hate leaving my drawings unfinished. Would that it were the same for my writing.
Should I ever get Aoudin and Leiliya's story written, it would either fall into obscurity probably driving me to inevitable suicide or become the next LOTR. Of course, it will always stay in my head, so I really don't think it's an issue...
Bah... I'm going to bed now, so it's Rollin's turn to nag me incessantly. At least I'll sleep harder with my new blackout curtains
Sumimasen!
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