Demon Spider encounter #3

I thought that once we moved, I would be free of the wrath of Demon Spider and his minions. Apparently, I was mistaken.

So far they haven't managed to find my new house, but these arachnid ninjas are infiltrating other places I haunt.

Appropriate, considering the most recent location was my Tae Kwon Do do jang.

I have private lessons occasionally with the grandmaster to work on my kick technique because my rotating sidekicks are abysmally uncontrolled (I have no balance at all). Anyway, we had finished kicks and I was working on my basic forms while he took a call. The form I was working on calls for a step back at one point. Not even a second after I took that step back, a large black mass suddenly fell from the ceiling, just where I had been standing moments before. Now, the ceiling is black, so I just thought it was a piece of insulation or something. So I glanced down.

As you have doubtless figured out by now, it was not a piece of insulation. It was the effin' biggest non-tarantula spider I had ever seen in my life. One of those black shiny ones with the pointy butt and loooong weirdass front legs. Legspan and all, it was about the size of my fist.

To my credit, I didn't scream (I didn't want to freak out the grandmaster). I just ran like a maniac to the other side of the room and waited for him to come back, trying to build up my guts to kill it before he came back and saw me running from a spider when I was supposed to be training to fight.

Oh, the irony.

Sadly, I wasn't able to do it. Every time I would take a step toward it to squash it, it would start to move. It's their movement that freaks me out so bad - not necessarily the size (although that makes their movement more defined). It's the way their legs move, all one at a time with little creeping motions. So when he'd move, I'd panic and run away.

Eventually, Master Kim did get off the phone and came back. I pointed the failed ninja assassin out to him and he appropriately remarked "Oh, that is big." like it was nothing, then proceeded to beat it to death with a kick pad. Although it took several good shots.

Unfortunately, he left the carcass there for an instructor to get and I couldn't concentrate anymore with it there. He hates spiders *almost* as much as I do, apparently. So I left and went home to make myself a cup of hot chocolate (yes, in July) and work a little.

Now I'm terrified of my own do jang. I just pray they hire an exterminator before Friday.

Also, I learned that even the grandmaster can hate spiders. And that learning tae kwon do will not cure me of my arachnophobia.