Then it got rejected from several of the more exclusive deviantART groups. I was so depressed... I thought it was the best I could do. Why didn't everyone else think so, too?
I was so depressed that my ears started to ring for lack of blood to my brain. So I shut my blackout curtains, lit my oil burner and candles, and turned on my misting fountain. Now, locking myself in a dark room with candles may seem depressing to most people, but this is how I recharge. The dark is like a blanket to me; I can't explain it. After an hour or so of chilling, I managed to get my resolve back. If that painting wasn't good enough, I'll just make a better one.
Of course, I had no idea WHAT was wrong with it. It's the artists' paradox. I can best compare it to writing -- as a writer AND a semi-professional editor, I naturally try to edit my own writing. But something about trying to correct your own work is impossible. You know what it's supposed to say and what you're supposed to feel, so you can't really pick up on mistakes that other people will notice. That's why, no matter how good or famous you are, you have to have an editor. I think it's the same way with art. So, I looked for a critic or two.
I wound up with like eight.
I appreciate all of their time, though! Two of them are friends from deviantART and the rest are random people from craigslist who read a desperate post I made shortly after blowing out the candles and turning the lights back on. I am going to post the most helpful of the suggestions they made, hoping they won't mind.
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I need to work on:
Hair -- A bit stringy and the scalp needs work
Eyes -- Stylized eyes not blending smoothly with realistic style
CLOTHING -- I have GOT to find a good fabric tutorial. I have such a mental block that it's holding me up big time.
I was suggested to:
-Study anatomy and draw stick figure skeletons to get a better idea of the body's framework
-Sharpen up my images a little
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Two things were pleasant surprises, though. My skin painting got consistent compliments and no one mentioned the background. I was certain everyone would tell me I failed utterly at the background.
If anyone has anything to add or flesh out in the list, I welcome your critique! That's why I use this blog in the first place... it's not to brag about my art, it's to get help. My goal is to have enough quality art to entire our local festival next year, and for that to happen, I need all the help I can get!
I suppose it's stupid for me to care THAT much about getting into the "quality" groups, but I can't help it. Normally, I am probably the LEAST self-conscious person you will ever meet. I wear some pretty ridiculous stuff, say what's on my mind, and don't really care what people think -- and that's not just talk since anyone who knows me would back it up. However, when it comes to art, I turn into this desperate, unsure, pathetic person who just wants everyone to love me. It's like total bipolarity. I don't understand it. But I do know that the desperation to be loved is driving me to improve my work in leaps and bounds.
When I get a hard critique, every word is like a slap in the face. Yet, it's like a good slap in the face that wakes you up from a nightmare. I can't really explain that, either...
So just keep in mind that your harsh words help wake me up! As long as they're constructive, of course. Otherwise I'd just think you're an idiot and move on with my life.
Cheers!
OH, I almost forgot... What does everyone think of my new header? I'd been sort of working on it on and off for awhile. I like it -- as much as I can without wondering what's wrong with it hahaha.
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